Man is made or unmade by himself; in the armoury of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself; he also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace.
(with 35 mg) The whole experiment was very quiet. There was no nystagmus, no anorexia, and insignificant visuals with the eyes closed. I was restless with a bit of tremor for the first couple of hours, and then became drowsy. Would I do this again? Probably not. It doesn't seem to offer anything except speculation about the nature of the high. The high was pleasant, but quite uneventful.
(with 40 mg) For me there was a deep feeling of peace and contentment. The euphoria grows in intensity for several hours and remains for the rest of the day making this one of the most enjoyable experiences I have ever had. It was marvel-ous talking and joking with the others. However, I was a little disappointed that there was no enhanced clarity and no deep realizations. There was not a problem to be found. There were no motivations to discuss anything serious. If I had any objection, it would be with the name, not the pharmacology.
(with 40 mg) It developed into a strange and indefinable something. It is unworldly. I am very much in control, but with an undertone of unreality that is a little reminiscent of high doses of LSD. If there were a great deal of sensory input, I might not see it. And if I were in complete sensory quiet I would miss it, too. But just where I am, I can see it. Eerie state of awareness. And by the 8th hour I am sober, with no residue except for some slight teeth clenching, and pretty much disbelieving the whole thing.
(with 60 mg) Visuals very strong, insistent. Body discomfort remained very heavy for first hour. Sense of implacable imposition of something toxic for a while. I felt at the mercy of uncomfortable physical effects--faint or pre-nausea, heavy feeling of tremor (although tremor actually relatively light) and general dis-ease, un-ease, non-ease. Kept lying down so as to be as comfortable as possible. Fantasy began to be quite strong. At first, no eyes closed images, and certainly anti-erotic. 2nd hour on, bright colors, distinct shapes--jewel-like--with eyes closed. Suddenly it became clearly not anti-erotic. That was the end of my bad place, and I shot immediately up to a +++. Complex fantasy which takes over--hard to know what is real, what is fantasy. Continual erotic. Image of glass-walled apartment building in mid-desert. Exquisite sensitivity. Down by ? midnight. Next morning, faint flickering lights on looking out windows.
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